Thursday, 16th April 2009
I am saying this again. My mum is a survivor and genuinely compassionate. Her sacrifice was not only for us, but for others as well. Her own struggles are never reasons to turn away others who seek her help. I sometimes think that she gives too much of herself and I get angry when others take advantage of her but a part of me admires her altruism.
As I mentioned, our house is big and one or two rooms are rented out. Many times, friends or family members who need temporary accommodation would approach her. Some were genuine and stayed without giving trouble but some clearly took things for granted by capitalizing on mum’s giving nature. I would be consumed with rage but mum always forgives. She tells me to leave it to Allah to judge and punish if the person truly had bad intentions.
I have a cousin who has stayed with us for many years that I consider him my brother. He is a nice guy, well mannered, hardworking and has utmost respect for my mother. There’s only one problem. His addiction to drug abuse. At one point in time, he started hallucinating and behaved irrationally. I had no choice but to get the authorities involved so he could be institutionalized and treated. I got pretty mad and argued with mum over choosing to be compassionate with disregard to our safety.
My mum, however, was unrelenting. She prayed hard for his recovery and welcomed him back when he got well. She talks to him everyday, giving him encouragement with complete faith that he could overcome his addiction. Her love is unconditional. His own family members do not even show any concern. This cousin has a brother who recently became homeless as well and guess what? My mum welcomed him too. I told you, I often fault her for having a heart that is ‘too big’. I tend to get quite jealous too.
She gives too much, all her life. Since young, I have learnt to be considerate and not ask my mum for too much because I knew the hardships that were facing us. I have always tried to be independent and earn my own income to provide for myself, but whenever I asked mum for something, she would never refuse me. By hook or by crook, she would always try to fulfill my siblings’ needs or mine.
My little brother recently went into the Police Academy to do his National Service (compulsory for all guys in Singapore for 2 years unless exempted due to special reasons). He is away in camp during weekdays and comes home only during the weekends. My mum started baking cookies some weekends for him to bring to camp. Once, I woke up and told mum I dreamt of eating prawns and the next day, although she was on tight budget and prawns are not exactly cheap, she bought them and cooked prawn sambal (a spicy condiment) for me.
It is not just for us. She gets requests from many other family members from immediate family to some as distant as my dad’s sister’s in-laws. One morning I saw her cooking many pieces of thosai and she told me she was doing it for her customer who has a big family with many children. She did that just out of wanting to do something for them.
I could go on and on about my mother’s kind nature. I do realize that Allah has given me the best I could have and I would be a complete fool not to cherish her. I would never be able to requite her sacrifices. I have my shortcomings and I am not always kind to my mum but I love her so much. I love her so much. I love her so much.
Allahumma ighfir lanaa wa liwaalidaynaa warhamhum kamaa rabbawnaa sighaaran
“Oh Allah, forgive us and our parents and have mercy on them (like how they had mercy on us) as they brought us up from young”
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